graduation could not come any sooner. here i am, yet again, in the art center listening to bloc party, ratatat, cat power, roisin murphy... all those bomb artists i pump when i wanna relax or am just not feeling like visualizing myself in some motivational sports video. here's a little update for all none of you that read this: i had a job. i had it and it was stripped away from me without me even knowing it. it was with seattle magazine doing design and production. they said they wanted me, they said i started on tuesday [this last tuesday], and when i waited for the call, email, anything, it never came. turns out they went with someone with more availablity... after they said yes whilst knowing my availability.
seriously guys. seriously.
it was one of those ground-breaking moments though, where i realized how much stress and emphasis i put on my career. when i found out i didn't get it after all, it felt like i was being broken up with. the only time i've ever been broken up with was my sophomore year in high school and it was in a note, but it was my first boyfriend so it stung pretty badly, duh. it was the same thought process though, where you center your entire world around your significant other and are subconsciously more than willing to drop anyone and everyone for the love of your life. i had developed that mindset over the course of the weekend. scary. i can't imagine what things are going to be like when i get an actual job. could you imagine if i ever got married? i'd be bridezilla for sure... good thing i'm not. and i wouldn't be bridezilla, so don't worry about it.
thinking about it though, it was too good to be true. i called the temp agency that i had applied to last summer [aahh, cue cold war kids 'hospital beds'] and asked if they happened to have any entry level jobs at the moment, that i was still receiving their emails but didn't have 3 years of professional experience under my belt. i left the message with the secretary and went back to eating wild ginger food in the box office.
she called me back about 5 minutes later and said they did have something, asked if my resume was current and if i had a portfolio i could send them. i had made one the night before [score] so i gave her the link and crossed my fingers the rest of my shift. i woke up around 10am the next morning with 3 missed calls, a voicemail and an email from her, begging me to call her back, that she had some excellent news. as i was about to, i saw she was calling again. she excitedly explained that they wanted to hire me, blah blah blah. i freak out, etc. etc.
the only thing that's racing through my head is "i am beating the system, defying all odds, and totally badass right now" mixing ever-so-slightly with a little "how the hell am i going to add something else on top of finishing my senior show, working at 3D, doing my internship, and school?" but the former was definitely more prevalent...
i'm trying to tell myself now that time in between is good, that i need to focus on the work that i have now so i can save up for a laptop and everything so i CAN work. i don' even want to think about all of the things i have to pay for in the near future: rent, deposit, laptop, the creative suites, etc..
it's gonna be a crazy summer. bring it.
No comments:
Post a Comment